I’ve been meaning to voice this for a while now, but i just wasn’t quite sure how to. I still don’t but i’m writing it all down in hopes that one day i will be able to explain myself to you. I’ve been hiding inside my mind for quite some time, and i havn’t yet fully resurfaced. For the past six months something’s been wrong. I don’t know how to phrase it other than saying that at the most random of times I get this overwhelming, all encompassing, chest crushing, lung busting, sadness that washes over me and makes me shake. It isn’t justified and it really has no source. It’s hard to describe the feeling other than saying that it makes me want to crawl out of my skin and burn up in the night air. It makes me want to sleep without dreaming and it makes me want to forget. It makes me want to run and run, but not out of breath because it makes me want my lungs to be non exsistent. It makes me want to learn how to breathe through my eyes because the aching sensation in my chest is becoming a burden I can not bare. I want the crushing pain to dissipate. This feeling makes me want to sink into the soft earth and lie with the worms and dirt. It makes me want to be so many things and nothing at the same time. I mean you wake up scared you’re going to die but i wake up i’m going to live; live forever inside of this mental prison. Sincerely, Me